AFI's Crash Love ~ ...Another Review

Let me be the first to admit that I might have posted in haste when it comes to AFI's album Crash Love. Now, over a year later I would like to re-review the album again. I've said it once, I'll say it again. Sometimes you've just gotta let an artist blow their load all over your face before you can actually enjoy the CD.

Additionally, I shall also review this album in the order I have set it in my iPod, not the traditional order.

1) Torch Song ★★★★★
This is now my absolutely favorite introduction to any album ever. So much so, I actually have lyrics from it permanently tattooed on my arm... no, seriously. I fucking have the lyrics, "I saw you. Angels came to light your path. I heard you... keep their wings pressed under glass" tattooed on my shoulder. Pure perfection.

And what's better is if you research the Torch Song Trilogy is kinda makes you wonder what is going on in Davey's life... hmmm.

2) Beautiful Thieves ★★★★
My view on this track has not changed. It is my second-least favorite on the CD (not counting Veronica Sawyer Smokes... we'll discuss that later). But this is a good track. I still feel like this could be slipped into the middle of Decemberunderground and nobody would notice.

3) Medicate ★★★½
This song hasn't changed either. It's my least favorite on the album and I honestly think they choose to put this song out as the sequel so they wouldn't get noticed because there are plenty of hard hitter that could have gotten sick radio play and this was not one of them.

4) Cold Hands ★★★★½
Wow, how things have changed. This has become a huge favorite on the album. I posted earlier how much I hated this song and that I thought it was boring filler. Not so much now. I actually really love the chorus now. The lyrics are some of my favorites as well.

5) Too Shy To Scream ★★★★★
Yeah... so this is probably the most played song on my iPod throughout 2010. I blame Beyonce. You see, somebody uploaded the Single Ladies music video with this song playing instead of Single Ladies... and for some reason I loved it.

6) End Transmission ★★★★½
What I love about this song is mostly the line, "Go grab your bag I'll bring the gun." Most particularly because we used to refer to Pandora's (now ex) boyfriend Lance as 'the bag'... short for douchebag. It's okay, she calls him that now too. But anyways, we'd always talk about how this song was Davey telling Pandora to grab her bag (aka Lance) and he'd bring the gun. Bwahaha.

7) OK, I Feel Better Now ★★★★
Definitely the slowest song on the CD but it's a goodie. I don't especially go looking for this track but it flows great in my version of the list.

8) I Am Trying Very Hard To Be Here ★★★★★
This is still the best song on the album. It still should have been the first single and I still love it love it.

9) We've Got The Knife ★★★★
Okay, yeah, this is technically a b-side but I think it should have been on the album. It really feels like Sing the Sorrow and when sprinkled on this album it feels right.

10) Sacrilege ★★★★
Finally Davey belts out his "fuck religion" song. What makes me laugh is how many AFI fans like to pretend this song isn't directly an attack on organized religion. Talk about delusion.

11) Too Late For Gods ★★★★½
Another track that was actually a b-side and totally should have been on the album. I love the line, "What did I tell you? I promised I'd give you a story." This song goes great after Sacrilege.

12) Darling, I Want To Destroy You ★★★★★
This is my second favorite song on the album and totally should have been the second single. I just love the part when he says, "And here's my favorite part... where you may find my heart... and I disappear." Gives me chills every time.

13) It Was Mine ★★★★★
The final track took me the longest to like. And now I just love it. Not sure what else to say... really.

And here we come to Veronica Sawyer Smokes. Wait. What? What am I talking about. There's no such song as Veronica Sawyer Smokes. If there was I'd hate it and I'd have to pretend it didn't exist. Because as long as it doesn't exist I totally love every single track Davey has put out since like forever... So yeah. Veronica Sawyer? Nope, doesn't exist. Isn't real. It's fake. Not real. ::puts fingers in ears:: Lalalalala.

Oh, a final note. I still hate the album cover but the name of the CD has grown on me. So I just substituted my own cover which is featured above.

Bottom Line: I now hold this CD as a very close second to Sing the Sorrow. Oh Davey, please forgive my sins and trespasses. I beseech you to keep me in your good graces.

The Phoenix Shall Rise Again...

Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated.

It has been over a year and today I bring you the rising phoenix, the return of The Labyrinth.

I come back to you today on All Hallow's Eve, when the viel between the world of the living and the world of the dead is at it's most thin. I return. I rise. I soar... like a phoenix.

Below is a fan-made video for Tarja Turunen's "My Little Phoenix."

Enjoy...

AFI's Crash Love ~ A Review

I'll pull no punches here. This album is a pretty big disappointment. I've broken it down song by song. But before that, I'd like to talk about a few things first. Oh and please remember, this just one fan's opinion that I am more than entitled to it. If you disagree, do so respectfully.

I in no way want to shout "AFI has changed" and cry. Yes, AFI has changed and I completely expected so. They changed when they went to Sing the Sorrow and they changed when they went to Decemberunderground. I welcome change that I like. I don't welcome change I don't like.

Many people love this album. Many hate it as well. Of course, once the dust settles, and the fanboys and fangirls have their multiple eargasms, they will likely change their opinion of the album. Too many are jumping to "this is waaaaay better than Sing the Sorrow." I'm sure the fans will still love this CD after they get used to it but I doubt they will hold it up so high. Sing the Sorrow will always be AFI's best is my opinion.

One of the smaller problems with this album is it's length. Only 43 minutes long. This is their shortest, not by much, DU was only 44 minutes long, but it seems like very little for such a long wait. The best song on the album in my opinion is 2 minutes 39 seconds long!

One of the more annoying things about this album is it's name and cover art. I won't harp on this but I absolutely hate both. They feel like a pop album; like Miley Cyrus or the Jonas Brothers. When I expected AFI to grow as an artist I didn't expect them to grow into love, hearts, and gold.

It might just be me, but overall, this CD is just too pop. I'm not against anything being mainstream. And even though the lyrics are dark... ish, I really wasn't expecting or wanting such an upbeat and happy album. I don't know why... I should have expected such from the gay ass title and cover. (i mean this in no disrespect to the band or Davey in specific... since I myself am gay, lol).

So here's the track by track review:

1) Torch Song ★★★★½
This CD starts out pretty good. This song really sounds like a mix of all the good from STS and DU. This is definitely a great opener. I love the lyrics, "I'd tear out my eyes for you my dear, oh my dear."

2) Beautiful Thieves ★★★★
This track is not bad. It sounds very DU-ish (which is fine with me). I enjoy this song enough to keep it on my iPod but I certainly wouldn't call it 'single' material. To me the best CDs are ones where each and every track could be a single.

3) End Transmission ★★★★
Now the album starts getting weird. In a good way though. This song sounds very 80s and very Black Audio-ish. I like it. Not quite sure why this girl is grabbing her bag and he's grabbing the gun, but it's pretty cool. By this track I am happy with the album... so far that is...

4) Too Shy To Scream ½
Oh how quickly the mighty fall. I absolutely hate this song. I have to work hard just to finish the not even 3 minute track. It sounds like they went to some 1950's soda stand and started dancing to the jukebox. This is NOT rock. This is where AFI turns to gay ass pop. I have finished the song once... which just sorta ends outta no where. Oh, and I gotta make fun of the first line, "I come quietly." Yeah right, when you should "Oh!" at the beginning of every track.

5) Veronica Sawyer Smokes ★
Suddenly we've slipped and fallen into the CW. I have trouble finishing this track as well. Too pop. Too boring. Just... dare I say, un-AFI.

6) OK, I Feel Better Now ★
Well, I don't. By this point in the CD I am being quite let down. A few really good beginning songs that just slip into total shit. The problem with this song (which is starting to leave the the pop world, but not entirely) is that it just sounds like total filler. Nothing stands out and I just don't care.

7) Medicate ★★★½
I like this song to start but it got old really quick. I can remember how much Miss Murder and Girls Not Grey just made me so excited for the full album. Medicate is good, not great. It had two problems. The first is that it seems to stick out like a sore thumb among the other tracks. The second is that it sounds as if their label said to them, "make a song specifically tailored to Guitar Hero and we'll call that the first single."

8) I Am Trying Very Hard To Be Here ★★★★½
This is the best track on the CD in my opinion. It sounds more like Miss Murder than anything else, I think (other probably don't). I think this should have been the first single. Maybe it'll be the second. There are two problems with it I see. The first is that the winners who sing the whole "flash flash car crash" part don't seem nearly as enthusiastic as they could. The second is that this song is only 2 minutes and 39 seconds long. If it were longer, I'd have given it five stars. This song is exactly where I was hoping for AFI to go with the whole album... but they didn't.

9) Sacrilege ★★½
This is the only song that actually does sound like their old stuff. Unfortunately it sounds like a scrapped b-side on Sing the Sorrow. The chorus is kinda boring and the song as a whole sounds like filler. This is one of the tracks that could totally use some angry Davey shouting or screaming but the entire CD lacks that.

10) Darling, I Want To Destroy You ★★★★
With this song we are back into a pop sound. This is the most DU-ish sounding song on the CD in my opinion. I like it... I can't say why, but I do. It sounds very very much like a song that would be heard on the CW as well.

11) Cold Hands ★
Eh. Boring. Filler. Terrible chorus. I just don't care.

12) It Was Mine ★
This was rumored and expected to be their powerful and epic end track ballad like Endlessly, She Said and This Time Imperfect. Those songs have stood the test of time as truly amazing emotion filled tracks of epicness that It Was Mine fails to deliver. This too feels like filler

Overall Score: ★★½

The songs just don't hold together well. I miss lengthy tracks. I miss hidden tracks. I miss shouting and feeling. I miss rock. I know, I know, they change and evolve and that's exactly what they have done. But they didn't evolve in the direction I expected men in their mid-thirties to go.

It seems very clear that they and/or their label is pushing them in the direction of teenagers. That disappoints because I don't feel like they were pointing in that direction in the past.

I have given this my open-est mind. I love a few tracks but nothings seems to have the massive power all of their previous works had. Each CD had on it an epic song (think Kiss and Control, ...But Home Is Nowhere) and an epic ballad (think This Time Imperfect, Endlessly She Said, God Called In Sick Today). This CD has neither.

Some people (mainly young AFI fans who weren't even in high school when Sing the Sorrow was released) will absolutely love this CD and give it a perfect score. I'm willing to bet that Davey and Jade love this CD too and good for them.

Me, personally, just feel so meh about this CD. The powerful response I got from Sing the Sorrow, Decemberunderground, and even Black Audio's CexCells does not happen with Crash Love.

All I can do now is enjoy the few gems that this CD brings and patiently wait for the new Black Audio CD. Davey says that it's already done... but in the last few years I've learned I can only trust less than half of what he says in interviews.

Sigh. Not all is lost this Autumn. I have really enjoyed the new Three Days Grace, Nelly Furtado, and can't wait for the new Breaking Benjamin, Atreyu, and Shakira which all show far more potential.

Watch Alice, Wasted, Wash Her FACE!

Omigod! Been listening to a lot of AFI (hoping to drum up some excitement for Cash Love) and I came accross these videos. The first one Mandar showed me years ago. They're hilarious.

You see, brilliant as Davey can be, he often is hard to understand. These are interpretations of what he's saying in their songs. Hilarious!

Albums '09: Past & Future

So 2009 so far has been a very good year for music that I like. First I'm gonna talk about CDs that have come out this year already that were good in my opinion. Then I'll movie on to some upcoming albums from some of my favorite artists.

LaFee ~ Ring Frei ★★★½

German "pop" band LaFee released their 4th studio album in January. I say "pop" because they are considered that in Germany however I myself would call them rock (or at the very least soft rock). Ring Frei is just as good as their previous albums and didn't dissapoint. Not stellar. But darn good. The stuff that was good was good but the stuff to skip was easily skipable. Oh and if you haven't heard of Lafee, the lead singer is female and is eighteen, believe it or not.
Download: Scheiß Liebe, Eiskalter Engel, Lieber Gott


Hoobastank ~ For(n)ever ★

I was happy with their first CD. I really liked their second CD. I absolutely fell in love with their third CD. I used to have a huge crush on openly atheist lead singer Doug Robb. What the fuck happened! I hated this CD. It just sounded like a b-side collection. Very unhappy. Boo!


Utada Hikaru ~ This Is The One ★★★★½

Simply one of the best CDs of the year. Her first english CD was amazing and this just blew it out of the water. I haven't fallen in love with an R&B album like this in a long time. I have a Pavlov's dog association with this CD because I was listening to it all the time while reading Carl Sagan's cosmos... but that's just random. So what keeps her from getting a perfect five stars? The last track, Me Muero. Perfect right up 'til the end. Strangely Utada herself says that's her favorite song. Oh well. An amazing R&B album by and amazing Japanese artist.
Download: Taking My Money Back, This One (Cry Like A Child), Poppin'


Marilyn Manson ~ The High End of Low ★★★½

Twiggy is back and it's easy to tell. A lot of people call this album 100x better than his last album Eat Me, Drink Me but I disagree (because I fell in love with Eat Me, Drink Me). Like LaFee's CD this CD has some amazing tracks but it also has some shitty ones. Luckily there are a lot of songs so once you weed out the bad ones you still have a near full album. Is he shocking anymore? No. Is he still a good artist. Absolutely. Manson will always be one of my favorites.
Download: Blank & White, I Have To Look Up Just To See Hell, We're From America


Taking Back Sunday ~ New Again ★★★★★

They kicked out (or he left) their lead guitarist. Did much change...? Nope. Why does this CD get a perfect score? Because I love every single track and don't skip anything. Fantastic album. The best CD that's come out this year.
Download: Swing Swing, Where My Mouth Is, Carpathia

Emir ~ Ben Sen Olamam ★★★★½

A new artist. An amazing artist. A clone of Tarkan (I swear!). Not only is he just like Tarkan, he was produced and written by Tarkan. If this doesn't get your seat wet nothing will (unless your a heterosexual male, lol). This CD just screams tarkan and I can listen to it all the way through. Not a perfect score because there are some 'ok' tracks. But overall, fantastic. I want more Emir!
Download: Ben Sen Olamam, Tornistan, Şeklim Başka

Cobra Starship ~ Hot Mess ★★★★½

Another near perfect CD. This one has one not-so-great track but the rest is pure gold. Be prepared to go feel like you're in a warp-zone between 1988 and 2009 with this gem. The best thing Cobra has going for them is a really unique sound. I highly suggest this CD even if you don't like thier first single "Good Girls Go Bad" as I would call that their second to worst song on the album. Perhaps a guilty pleasure, but hey, if it's good, it's good.
Download: You're Not In On The Joke, Hot Mess, Living In The Sky With Diamonds

~ So that brings us up to date. There is still a lot of new shit to come, see below. ~

Shakira ~ She Wolf
First Single - She Wolf
Release Date: Oct 5, 2009
Confidence - ★★★★★

First things first, I have always loved everything that has come out of Shakira. She is absolutely my favorite female performer of all time. Her new track, She Wolf (which is nothing like anything she's done before) is amazing. I cannot stop listening to it (and the Spanish version, "Loba" is just as good). I have complete confidence that I will love this entire album. Oh, and if you're a straight male and this video doesn't make you cream your pants... check your dick!!!


Sarbel ~ Untitled
First Single - Mou Paei
Release Date: Late Fall
Confidence - ★★★★

I have pretty high confidence in this CD because Sarbel's albums have gotten progressively better over time. This next CD will be his fourth... and yes, he is a bit of a guilty please. I'm still listening to his last CD, Kati San Esena, like it was brand new. Oh and yes, the video is cheesy. But he looks pretty in it and I love the song.


t.A.T.u. ~ Happy Smiles (English Edition)
First Single - Snowfalls
Release Date: Late Fall
Confidence - ★★

The confidence in this is low for two reasons. First of all, it's probably just going to be an English version of their last CD. Second, ... that's if we ever actually even get this CD. I've had to put up with a lot of crap from them, saying this, doing that. Oh well. I hope it's good.


AFI ~ Crash Love
First Single - Medicate
Release Date: Sept 29, 2009
Confidence - ★
Oh boy. Here we go. First things first, I love AFI. My absolutely favorite album of all time is their "Sing The Sorrow." Hands down. Send the competition home. But... AFI has been jerking me around a lot for the last two years. They announced an EP that never happened. They announced 2 music videos that never happened. I went to one of their concerts and they played for about 32 minutes while their opener Sick Of It All played for an hour and a half. They released a live DVD without a CD version ... oh wait, no, they released a CD too... a year later. So here we are, about 45 days away from a new CD. I hate the title of the CD. It doesn't sound anything like AFI to me. More like Miley Cyrus. Speaking of that. Check out the album cover here. Fucking ugly and gay and shitty. I hate it. And now I've listened to the first minute and a half of their first single and I am anything but impressed (despite how much Davey keeps shouting to the rooftops about how epic this CD is going to be). Oh and did I mention they had a 'Crash Love' t-shirt out a whole year ago and the CD still isn't out yet. Sounds to me more like Cash Love than Crash Love. Oh and I've seen a track-listing for the album and I'm not gonna lie, I'm not impressed.
What do I hope? I hope I love the CD. I hope Medicate is a bad sheep and the album as a whole is amazing. I hope it's just as epic as Davey is saying it is. I hope I love love love it but I cannot pretend to have any confidence in AFI right now. Prove me wrong boys. Please... prove me wrong.

Rammstein ~ Untitled
First Single - Liebe Ist Fur Alle Da
Release Date: Late Fall
Confidence - ★★★
The first single is really good, not amazing. Their last CD is was pretty good but not amazing. I hope the CD is great. They've been gone for a while so I hope that means they've been working hard!

3 Days Grace ~ Life Starts Now
First Single - Break
Release Date: Sept 22, 2009
Confidence - ★★★★
Their last CD was amazing and I can only hope they do just as good.


Atreyu~ Congregation of the Damned
First Single - Unknown
Release Date - October 27, 2009
Confidence - ★★★★★
I give this five stars because their last CD was perfect. It falls as my second favorite album of all time (a very close second to the aforementioned "Sing The Sorrow" by AFI). I could almost give this confidence four and a half stars because they're heading out on tour with Douchebag Undead this year. Lucky for me, I know that the band themself did not pick them, their record company did. Not to mention, I love the album title and the song titles seem very promising.


Tarkan ~ Gelenek (Rumored)
First Single - Unknown
Release Date - Late Fall (Rumored)
Confidence - ★★★★★
Everything that comes out of Tarkan is pure gold. He shits diamonds. My only hope is that the CD really does come out this year but as of yet we haven't had anything concrete. The only thing that is not going for Tarkan is how amazingly perfect his last CD Metamorfoz was. How do you go up when you've reached perfection?

Better Than A Hot Stuffed Gyro

Greek singer Sarbel has a new single out... Me likey!

RIP Michael Jackson & Perez Is A Douchebag

This is not gonna be your typical RIP Michael Jackson post. It is a tragedy and is terribly sad, especially for his family and the fans who had purchased his tickets. But one thing we can remember is Michael Jackson was surely a tortured soul and had major internal issues that he no longer must suffer with. At least we can say that he's no longer suffering. He was an inspiration for multiple generations and he changed the world, moving millions of musicians to produce amazing music. RIP Michael Jackson 1958-2009.

Now onto the douche. Perez Hilton.

If you're not familiar with him, he's got a website where he draws cum on celebrity faces and calls the thinnest celebrities fat cows (he himself being a fat cow). At the beginning his site was funny and quickly updated. Now it's total shit. He'll call Britney Spears and Jessica Simpson fat... then he'll turn around and talk about how terrible teen eating disorders are. He's done a lot of douchey things but within the last few days he's gone overboard. And you won't believe what he said about Michael Jackson.

Well, the first douchey thing he did was call Will.I.Am a faggot. The Black Eyed Peas's manager got so pissed he punched Perez in the face. So GLAAD (Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation), demanded him to appologize for saying "faggot" (especially considering that Perez himself is gay and has recieved GLAAD awards).

Did he appologize? No. He said he was sorry to his fans (lol) but not to Will.I.Am. Not to mention, he freaked out because people started saying things like "well, you deserved it" or "when you call people names and spread rumors for a living, this is what you get." Now he's playing the victim because he got hit. Of course he doesn't care about of the mental abuse he puts on people.

So today, Michael Jackson was rushed to the hospital and Perez posted this:

"We knew something like this would happen!!
Michael Jackson was taken by ambulance from his Holmby Hills home to a nearby Los Angeles hospital on Thursday afternoon!!
Supposedly, the singer went into cardiac arrest and the paramedics had to administer CPR!!!
His mother is even on the way to visit him!!!
We are dubious!!
Jacko pulled a similar stunt when he was getting ready for his big HBO special in ‘95 when he “collapsed” at rehearsal!
He was dragging his heels on that just like his upcoming 50 date London residency at the 02 Arena, of which he already postponed the first few dates!!!
Either he’s lying or making himself sick, but we’re curious to see if he’s able to go on!!!
Get your money back, ticket holders!!!!"

Did he appologize? No. Did he do anything? Yes! He deleted what he posted hoping that nobody would notice. What a fucking douche.

If there's one thing I can't stand it's a person who says something completely fucking terrible and decides he's such an assholey-douchebag that he won't appologize. What a fucking baby! And he's shocked that we are so sad that he got punched. I hope somebody punches him again.

I'm So Exicted.... And I Just Can't Hide It...

So there's a lot of stuff coming out in the second part of this year that I'm excited for. Yeah, I know. I'm a pop culture whore. Some of it's guilty pleasure, some not. Either way, I'm pumped! Recently I was very satisfied with the new Taking Back Sunday CD as well as the new Marilyn Manson CD. Mandar and I are also loving the Sims 3 so I hope what still is to come won't disappoint.

True Blood: Season 2 - June 14th



Harry Potter & The Half-Blood Prince - July 15th



Wii Sports Resort - July 26th



Julie & Julia - August 7th



New Cobra Starship CD - August 11th



I Can Do Bad All By Myself - Sept 11th



New Super Mario Bros. Wii - Holiday Season



In addition I am also looking forward to the new Richard Dawkins book for which I couldn't really find a good YouTube video for. There are also new Tarkan, Shakira, and Atreyu CDs slated for release this year!

Good Cover, Bad Cover

I was tagged or memed or whatever to pick a good cover song and a bad cover song. I couldn't make up my mind on the good cover so there are two. There are tons of bad covers but the one I picked was the first to come to mind.

Good Cover
Alien Ant Farm's version of "Smooth Criminal" by Michael Jackson


Atreyu's version of "You Give Love A Bad Name" by Bon Jovi


Bad Cover
Jessica Simpson's version of "These Boots..." by Nanci Sinatra

How Very Inappropriate

Last night at Aurora's house we were watching some great Bollywood videos. "Nimbooda" below was one of them. We jokingly said that this was the Indians do during the 5-minute breaks at work. I might have hit a low-brow moment when at very end of video people are cheering, I said, "Quick! Everybody get their Dell headsets back on!"

Haha. I'm priceless.

"You Can Ride To The Top, But You Can't Ride On My Cock"

A band I love called Cobra Starship is about to come out with a new CD late this summer (rumored to be coming out August 1st!). I'm not sure if it's their first single or not, but they added a new track from their upcoming CD on their MySpace which you can listen to below. It's called "Pete Wentz Is The Only Reason We're Famous" but worry not, it has nothing to do with Pete Wentz or Fall Out Boy.

I saw Cobra in concert last fall and I hope they go on tour again. They're on tour now but they're only opening for Fall Out Boy (huet!). Last fall lead singer Gabe Saporta had an issue with his throat and couldn't sing that well. I'm willing to bet they are a lot better when their lead singer has a voice, lol. Oh and yes, I love the new song. I've listened to it about a million times already.

Fun With Captions! Tarkan-Style

So me, Mandar, and Aurora have been all up in a Tarkan mood lately (he's coming out with a new CD this year!! AHH!). So while panning the internet for good photos, I got some great ones. Of them, several were in dire need of a good caption. See below.

I Must Be One Of Those Fags

There is a band out there I hate. I mean, I hate. I have never hated a band more in my life than this band. I first heard of them because Pandora's boyfriend just loves them because he and his high school buddies drink to their songs. I thought that perhaps this horribly shitty band was no more known to the world than to teenage boys who got together every weekend to smoke weed, drink booze, and fuck nasty hoes. I was wrong.

At work last night, one of the managers had her iPod connected and was playing on shuffle. A song came on and I thought it sounded familiar... it was Hollywood Undead. I cannot even express how much I hate this band. I walked right up to the stereo playing the iPod and ripped the cord out. I wasn't going to listen to that shit. My manager got pissed off and said that she, "loves this band! They're so amazing!" She plugged it back in and started all over again. I dropped what I doing and walked as far away as possible into the dinning room and sat down, waiting until the song was over.

So let me tell you a little bit about Hollywood Undead. They are a group of six douchebags (Charlie Scene, Johnny 3 Tears, J-Dog, Da Kurlzz, Duece AKA The Producer, and Funny Man). They started out as an unsigned band on MySpace and got so popular that they got a real record deal. They wear hockey masks so that you can see what they really look like (although you can see them here without their masks thanks to some girls MySpace). So they have fake names and wear masks so that people don't know who they are. And I can understand why. Below are some chosen lyrics from four songs off their debut album Swan Songs.

Hollywood Undead - "Christmas In Hollywood"
So meet me under the mistletoe lets fuck
so meet me by the manura lets get drunk

Little Timmy stole from 7-11
So we stopped by his house with a pair of sevens
We drank in his room with some dude named Kevin

He didn't leave cookies but we needed a snack
So we took the beer back and I FUCKED HIM IN THE ASS!!!

underneath his suit was just a bunch of pillows.
instead of bags of presents, he had bags of dildo's.

Hollywood Undead - "Undead"
Motherfuckers who don't know what,
You better watch what you say.
From these industry fucks,
To these faggot ass punks,
You don't know what it takes,
To get this motherfucking truck.

Johny's taking hands up, with all the faggots who hate,
Cause I am good motherfucker and there's a price to pay,
Yeah, I am a good motherfucker and its judgment day!

I'm getting used to this nuisance,
And all the fags who bad mouth this music,

You need to slit your wrist, get pissed and go jump off a bridge,

Because its nothing in my mouth except my dick and what I spit,
So my dick is in my hand when I respond to faggots talking shit,
Speaking of fags, already wrap with the drag,
We killed him and then we stuffed his body in the Cadillac.

Hollywood Undead - "Pimpin"
Where I ride with jdog
And it's like, okay, basically
We get shitfaced and crazy
We're screaming "FUCK THE POLICE!"

We're six Caucasians, hell raisin'
Blazin', making zero pay
Can't wait to drink to stop the pain

And I got my soldiers in the back so you don't wanna face me
And when your girl look up at me, I'm lookin' right down
And all that yappin', you know you gon' get a smack down

Hollywood Undead - "Everywhere I Go"

Wake up
Grab beer
Grab rear
Shave beard
Put on some scene gear
Gotta get drunk before my mom wakes up
Break-up with my girlfriend so I can bang sluts
I'm undead, unfed
Been sleeping on bunk beds
Since ten
So if I don't booze it, I'm gonna lose it
Everybody get to it, do it, get ruined

So just get buzzed and stay fucked up
We'll keep them panties droppin’

When I start drinking
My dick does all my thinking
Hoes want to be scene with me
And I like their big thick titties

I wanna see your booty rubbing against my dick
when I start buzzin'
Come on girls I wanna see you drinkin'
I wanna see your brain start shrinkin'
Make a move I saw you winkin'
Drunken pussies what I'm thinkin'

So booze, violence, fags, sluts, more booze, more sluts. All they do is talk about drinking and fucking drunk girls. Wow, sounds like my kinda guys! Oh and we can't forget about them telling us their names. None of what I chose reflected this but they are constantly telling us who they are. So yeah, I must be one of those fags who bad mouth their music.

What is sad is not necessarily that they exist or that they are the way they are. It's the fact that there is a very real audience of people out there who likes them. There are people out there who really like their music. They sing along, get drunk, and think to themselves, "Oh how I wish I was just like them. I wish I could drink all day long and fuck drunk girls like they do in the songs. Hollywood Undead is just so cool! It's so cool they sing about breaking up with their girlfriend so they can fuck sluts. It's so cool they have nothing else in life but drinking. It's just so cool"

I Challenge You!!!

I challenge you to listen all the way through the following two videos from Bollywood sensation Aishwarya Rai and not have the dying urge to jump out of your chair and shake your booty! Really! LISTEN! AHHH! GODZILLA!

This One's A Panty Creamer!

I didn't cream my pants... but I might soon (when I get my hands on the entire Manson CD). This last week 6 of the 15 tracks off of Marilyn Manson's upcoming CD The High End of Low were leaked. One of the songs he officially put out and it's called "We're From America." I absolutely love this track. Especially lyrics like, "we're from America, it's where Jesus was born," and "we're from America, where we speak American," and of course, "we're form America, we turn literature into litter."

I love how this sounds like the really good days of Manson. My favorite album of his was Holy Wood and I never expected him to return to that kinda sound. Don't get me wrong, I love all of his CDs, but this new sound from The High End of Low sounds great!

The leaked songs are the following:

1. Arma-God-Damn-Mother-Fuckin'-Geddon
2. We're From America
3. The Wow
4. Into The Fire
5. Four Rusted Horses
6. May Be Harmful If Swallowed
   

Below you can hear "Arma-God-Damn-Mother-Fuckin'-Geddon" and "We're From America." Squee!!!! Oh... and the reason I named this post "This One's A Panty Creamer" is because after I told Mandar's cousin Aurora that I would burn her the new stuff she sent me a text that said "Ooo! I can't wait... he makes me cream my pants lol!"



Addition: According to sources close to Manson, the only "complete" track that has been leaked is "We're From America." Apparently the other five are demos or incomplete versions. Either way. They're still great! Especially Arma! By the way. The High End Of Low comes out on May 25th!

Addition #2: Fuckers removed the second video. WHY!? You can hear it for free on Manson's myspace page.

I'm Really Into Asian Chicks...

Especially right now. But not like that! Dirty minds! But for some reason I am all over music from Asian artists. First I was plotzing over Utada Hikaru's new CD and now I'm totally into this new girl from Korea named Boa Kwon. She's got a lot more sass than old Hungfutada. Check out her first English single below. Oh and yes, now we're beginning to tread into the waters of guilty pleasure. Man, if I were straight, I would totally beat off to her.

She Will Love You Long Time!

No, I'm not cracking some racial joke. Well... maybe a little (She actually does say that she "will love you long time" in one of her songs). But seriously, I downloaded Utada Hikaru's second English CD called This Is The One and it's actually really amazing. Her first CD Exodus was an unexpected gem in my CD collection and I'm more than satisfied with her sophomore English effort. At first I was a little afraid because I wasn't thrilled with her first single called "Come Back To Me." The most I listened to it the more it grew on me though. See video below.



Aww. Wouldn't they make an adorable blasian baby... Anywho! I decided to give the CD a chance anyhow and from the very first song I was into it. It feels very modern Japanese and very Western at the same time. It's very pop and hip hoppy and dancey. If she wasn't so damn talented you might call this a guilty pleasure but I feel no guilt listening to this.

If you haven't heard any of Utada, you will find the best stuff below. Below is her first single from her first English CD, Exodus. It's called "Easy Breezy" and yes she is saying "You're easy breezy and I'm Japanesey."



Now below this is Utada performing my favorite song from Exodus called "Kremlin Dusk". Now, it starts out slow but it really speeds up and it just breathtaking. She's absolutley amazing live.



This next video is her second single for Exodus called "You Make Me Want To Be A Man."



Now if your wondering what she sounds like in Japanese... AMAZING!



So if your interested in her new CD. Below you can preview a couple of tracks thanks to some videos I found on YouTube. The songs are as follows, "Apple & Cinnamon", "Dirty Desire", "On and On", and "Crying Like A Child."



Ugh! She's just so damn cute and Asian! Oh yeah, and Gwen Stefani's Harijuku girls can just go eat their hearts out. They ain't got shit on Hikki!

Soulja Boy Really Sucks...

So a friend of mine at work had me make her a CD. She loves hip hop and rap and wanted what she called "a good nigga mix." Strangely it all started when we started singing Ms. New Booty.

So anywho, she gave me a list and wanted me to put all the songs from her myspace on there. Most of the songs I've heard, a few I haven't. Now, generally I'm not crazy about rap or hip hop but every once in a while it's fun. Here is list of the songs that made it onto the CD.

1. Bubba Sparxx "Ms. New Booty"
2. Juelz Santana "There It Go (The Whistle Song)"
3. Lil' Jon feat. YoungBloodz "Snap Your Finger"
4. Jibbs "Chain Hang Low"
5. Beyonce "Diva"
6. 112 "Peaches & Cream"
7. Chris Brown "Kiss Kiss"
8. Ashanti feat. B2K "Fuck Song"
9. Soulja Boy Tell'em "Crank That"
10. Soulja Boy Tell'em "Gucci Bandana"
11. Snoop Dogg "Drop It Like It's Hot"
12. Pretty Ricky "Love Like Honey"
13. David Banner "Get Like Me"
14. Soulja Boy Tell'em "Booty Got Swag"
15. Lil' Kim "How Many Licks"
16. Bow Wow "Shortie Like Mike"
17. Soulja Boy Tell'em "Kiss Me Thru The Phone"
18. Mims "This Is Why I'm Hot"
19. R Kelly "Ignition"
20. Soulja Boy Tell'em "Donk"
    

Now, while burning it, I thought. This isn't that bad of a collection at all. I think I'll burn it for myself... minus one specific artist. Soulja Boy Tell'em.

Wow, he really sucks. I mean, really bad. Each of the songs she gave me all start out with him shouting his name and then the entire song is nothing more than him saying the same phrase over and over and over again.

All the other songs I put on the CD were from artists who have catchy songs with clever lyrics. I mean, I know, I'm not an expert on music or rap for that matter. But when I compare Soulja Boy with other rap and hip hop artists, he really sucks. He's so generic and so very repetitive. He's not a talented rapper. He can't sing. He's not attractive. He just plain sucks.

Der Sandmann Kommt...

The newest video from Oomph is finally here! (Yeah, I know, it came out a few weeks ago but the actual single doesn't come out until 27th Feb. Woo!)

Lest We Forget The AntiChrist Superstar!

I am a big fan of Marilyn Manson. Later this year he will be coming out with a new album called "The High End of Low." I'm so pumped to hear the new single called "I Want To Kill You Like They Do In The Movies."

Now his last CD "Eat Me, Drink Me" was really good. But it was short and most of the songs were slow and mellow. I still loved it, but I'm excited for some new shit that Manson has described as being a lot like his older stuff.

So in celebrating Marilyn Manson, below I've complied my top 10 favorite songs by him, as well as my top favorite 3 music videos.

And yes, as strange as it might seem, for the last week or so I've been listening pretty much to nothing but Marilyn Manson and Gokhan Ozen (see post below). Talk about a diverse musical taste!

My Personal Top Ten Marilyn Manson Songs

1. "Disposable Teens"
2. "The Beautiful People"
3. "Rock Is Dead"
4. "The Fight Song"
5. " Use Your Fist And Not Your Mouth""
   
6. "The Dope Show"
7. "Coma White"
8. "The Reflecting God"
9. "The Death Song"
10. "This Is The New Shit"