29 November 2008

Created By A School Teacher?


Okay, so I haven't been focusing on my other writing because I've been on my deathbed for the last three days. I usually get about there colds a year. Two of them are very mild. One of them is deathly. This year the deathly cold came on Thanksgiving day, which sucks because I had my deathly cold at the exact same time last year. The only silver lining is that because it came during the holiday I have only so far had to miss one day of work.

So while texting Pandora the subject of Airborne came up because her boss swears by it. Well she's a dumb bitch (the boss, not Pandora).

Now, Airborne marks itself as a "dietary supplement" that stops you from getting a cold. They actually don't specifically say that because for them to do so they'd have to prove it to the FDA. They market it as a "dietary supplement" because that's all it is. It contains vitamins and that's it. All it does is provide the taker with an extra boost of vitamins that their normal diet wouldn't have. However, if the person taking the Airborne usually takes a multivitamin already, then the effects plateau. You would have just as good of a result with a Flintstones vitamin.

But here is the underlining problem. Airborne, in general, isn't dangerous. However, it can be. It has dangerously high levels of Vitamin A and Vitamin C which can cause dizziness and diarrhea. By the big problem is not the diarrhea you might get. It's the fact that people are not only taking, but "swearing" by fake medication (that cost way to much to boot!).

So you might be saying, "What about when my doctor proscribes a placebo?" Well the biggest difference is that when the doctor prescribes a placebo, he knows it's a placebo. Furthermore, a placebo is cheaper than Airborne. A placebo is not something to take over the counter. It's something a doctor proscribes knowing that the disease that they are fighting can be improved by the work of a placebo.

My finer point is this. It's a scary world we live in today when a fake pill can be sold over the counter that claims to stop people from getting a cold. What's truly scary is that people continue to take this because of anecdotal claims of it's effectiveness rather than tried and tested scientific double-blind tests which has shown it to be ineffective. Before you know it, all the tested medicine will be replaced by bullshit concocted by school teachers who just "swear" by it.

Which leads me to my last point. It was created by a school teacher!? I daresay that nobody, NOBODY should ever take a pill created by a fucking school teacher. Are you kidding! I wouldn't dare ingest any medicine that was not created and tested by chemists and medical professionals. What on earth possessed this crazy bitch to think she could make medicine.

An article for further reading can be found here.

PS: A class action suit has been filed against Airborne for it's false claims.

2 comments:

Mandar Malum said...

Well, this particular boss Pandora speaks of has had a cold for the past two weeks, looks like Airborne hasn't helped this time... Not to mention the fact that she is also very religious, that shows you how much she knows.

Asylum Seeker said...

I find it hilarious that I have seen commericals for Airborne at least 15 times and didn't know what it was supposed to actually f@#$ing do until I read this post! Really trying to dodge the FDA, aren't they?
"It's not false advertising if we never say it's supposed to do something!"